Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
