I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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