I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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