she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize