she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
