you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Randomize
