I seem to have left my pride at pride
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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