What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
