I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I am naked and annoyed.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
