I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
