i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
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It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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