I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
