My nipple is on Facebook.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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