OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
