Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize