What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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