so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
