Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(802): View more from Vermont

it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear

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(352): View more from Florida

Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?

Fav 23 4960 1012
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

we're making bets on your personal life

Fav 14 4380 1495
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.

Fav 14 3206 1729
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(616): View more from Michigan

Shame tastes like burnetts and latex

Fav 7 1132 1611
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(614): View more from Ohio

Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.

Fav 7 913 1380
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(701): View more from North Dakota

I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.

Fav 13 1597 1814
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(307): View more from Wyoming

The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.

Fav 1 88 17
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(360): View more from Washington

No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst

Fav 0 28 34
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