I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize