I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
