I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
