I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize