So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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