Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
