speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize