I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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