Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
