Are we in a gay sports bar?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize