also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You were trust falling into bushes
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
