I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
