Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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