It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Randomize
