I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize