the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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