i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
