It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
