Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Your penis caused this!
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
