Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize
