You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
