So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
