Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss

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  (248): yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss http://tfl.nu/k4jz
  Replies (4) Good night (1209) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.

  (1-310): View more from California

  ewwww. she might as well have a dick.

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  (310): she cant drink. allergic to alcohol. (1-310): ewwww. she might as well have a dick. http://tfl.nu/aucq
  Replies (28) Good night (696) Bad night (1408)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.

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  (563): that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark. http://tfl.nu/i86g
  Replies (13) Good night (1229) Bad night (2476)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us

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  (828): Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us http://tfl.nu/ml7j
  Replies (3) Good night (2914) Bad night (833)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.

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  (404): He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like. http://tfl.nu/89fc
  Replies (40) Good night (629) Bad night (4231)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college

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  (905): when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college http://tfl.nu/ke7d
  Replies (43) Good night (1445) Bad night (6424)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  her facebook's as public as her vagina

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  (803): her facebook's as public as her vagina http://tfl.nu/w3ii
  Replies (43) Good night (3282) Bad night (2665)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"

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  (978): Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?" http://tfl.nu/0wwp
  Replies (20) Good night (7040) Bad night (1180)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...

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  (302): And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks... http://tfl.nu/1g5k
  Replies (13) Good night (1250) Bad night (2585)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.

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  (480): Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan. http://tfl.nu/ryui
  Replies (5) Good night (3369) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.

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  (612): he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers. http://tfl.nu/asbc
  Replies (4) Good night (2614) Bad night (1192)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job

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  (610): When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job http://tfl.nu/gbra
  Replies (4) Good night (3300) Bad night (1268)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.

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  (757): he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore. http://tfl.nu/szvz
  Replies (7) Good night (851) Bad night (2556)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours

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  (518): We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours http://tfl.nu/zbw4
  Replies (9) Good night (1082) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me

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  (516): dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me http://tfl.nu/r9vy
  Replies (4) Good night (625) Bad night (269)

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