Texts From Last Night

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  (585): View more from New York

  It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.

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  (585): It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight. http://tfl.nu/zyt9
  Replies (10) Good night (3386) Bad night (864)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?

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  (503): I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number? http://tfl.nu/ltxf
  Replies (55) Good night (3334) Bad night (1078)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day

  (240): View more from Maryland

  hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine

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  (301): i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day (240): hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine http://tfl.nu/f8k7
  Replies (10) Good night (4227) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there

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  (774): im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there http://tfl.nu/wpso
  Replies (8) Good night (4827) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.

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  (336): They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up. http://tfl.nu/5b65
  Replies (5) Good night (4170) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.

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  (804): finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets. http://tfl.nu/gp9t
  Replies (21) Good night (8319) Bad night (1219)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.

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  (908): My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place. http://tfl.nu/pxw5
  Replies (7) Good night (4366) Bad night (720)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.

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  (908): Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger. http://tfl.nu/ni0e
  Replies (17) Good night (8024) Bad night (2009)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.

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  (317): The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints. http://tfl.nu/xoq4
  Replies (6) Good night (932) Bad night (4739)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.

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  (720): I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me. http://tfl.nu/g7lo
  Replies (22) Good night (3564) Bad night (1162)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker

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  (313): Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker http://tfl.nu/hydd
  Replies (12) Good night (2937) Bad night (2723)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.

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  (901): Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn. http://tfl.nu/sdqi
  Replies (6) Good night (573) Bad night (1934)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?

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  (212): Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes? http://tfl.nu/3emh
  Replies (4) Good night (1234) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious

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  (360): Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious http://tfl.nu/bk41
  Replies (2) Good night (1120) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.

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  (850): A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween. http://tfl.nu/mp2j
  Replies (2) Good night (862) Bad night (346)

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