So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i just google imaged poop.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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