i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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