I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize