Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
