Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
