Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i have herpe
just one?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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