On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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