i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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