pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
there was a trapeze. enough said
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
