I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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